its MONDAY YALL

Praise the baby Jesus.

Thank the good Lord.

And all that.  I made it through another full week to MONDAY.

To be honest, these last 6 weeks have solidly kicked my ass.  Physically, mentally, emotionally, and for sure spiritually!  So to recap, I am in school full time (Macroeconomics, Business Communications, and Chemistry/Chemistry lab).  I work full time, teach 6-8 classes a week at Gold’s Gym and find time to kill it at Iron Tribe Fitness.  So.  There is a lot on my plate and I for sure have to practice to keep everything in perfect balance.  And it really is, as long as I stick to “the schedule” .  But the thing is.  I don’t like that.  I truly love being foot-loose and fancy free.  My old boss didn’t care if I took 2 hour lunches on Fridays, and I always appreciated that!  But now, I don’t get that luxury because Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday, I have class on my lunch hour.  And Thursdays  I teach three fitness classes because that is what I want to do.

But readers, I really want you to know.  This is not a complaint.  I love my life.  I am doing EXACTLY what I want to do truly!  I want to be in school.  I want to teach fitness, and I want to have time to myself to workout on my own.  There are people who DON’T think I can do it all.  I have had a couple of people in the last week tell me that I am doing too much.  That I can’t possible be happy being this busy and something has to give.  And to those people, I say – Look.  I am doing what I want to. And when I am tired, I need you to say, you CAN do this instead of encouraging me to stop.  I feel that this year is going to be very rewarding because I AM putting in my time.  Being single allows me so much more to take advantage of without having to check in with anyone or schedule around two people.  Don’t get me wrong – I get lonely LOTS not having a partner in crime and most times at night for the 5 seconds before I fall asleep, but I have these really fabulous friends who share everything with me so those times of being lonely and left out are few and far between.

SO to update what has happened in the past month!

1) Sold my car (the excellent Volvo) and in the asking price, actually traded out for another car.  So.  I netted a few dollars, got out of a car payment AND got a cute car!  When I had originally tried to sell my car, I was sharing with someone that I wanted this EXACT transaction to happen.  Of course I was laughed at (its normal! People forget how determined I am) and it took about 6 months but I now own a Infiniti QX4 with 155,000 miles on it, one owner (who happened to be an attorney-father of someone I went to high school with). And – freed up some income.  Damn those car payments.  I am not sure that I will have one again!

2) I am moving (on Friday!).  Again.  Back to my side of town 😉  Its actually about 2 miles from where I own a house.  But I am not responsible for land-lording stuff/house ownership stuff which frees me up to maximize my time for other things.  Plus my new roomies are REALLY cute – my age, one has a fashion degree, the other a marketing degree (so our brains work!).  One does CrossFit and understands that side, the other is in Marketing so I feel connected that way!  Plus, I just had a great feeling about the two.  And I have a front porch!

3)  I have had three tests in three different classes.  It’s a good benchmark for me.  I am not sure I am going to get the 4.0 I was thinking of – instead my goal is becoming more about the actual degree and graduating.  Like just physically graduating.  This will for sure be a year of learning!

4) I am finding myself more beautiful.  I know that sounds SO conceited   I get it.  But I am actively trying to be more positive about myself.

5)  I have been eating Paleo for over a year now.  Best.  Change. Ever.  But I must tell you.  This is not a damn diet.  I’m not cutting calories, I am certainly NOT counting calories, I don’t write down what I eat and I don’t eat all day long.  I have a longer post coming up soon about this.  But I don’t think you can call something a “diet” if its just a way of eating.  I don’t eat dairy unless I am at a restaurant and feel like ordering it.  I don’t eat grains, legumes and stay far away from the sugar demon.  And it has taken a FULL YEAR but I don’t crave sugar like I used to.  For instance, yesterday I had a piece of cake – it was from Gia’s and had some buttercreme- caramel icing on it.  Small sliver, ate some of the cake and most of the icing and then that was enough.  I swear that my body is running so well right now that I can hear when it is full and has had enough SO clearly.

 

So.  that is it.  That is what is going ON right now!  tumblr_mia5rots4B1r8fmpxo1_500 2013-01-22 11.30.28 2013-02-09 21.00.45 2013-02-12 09.20.41 2013-02-13 21.32.10 2013-02-13 22.34.44 2013-02-15 22.18.12 2013-02-17 07.07.16 2013-02-17 08.04.06

make it yours.

Over the next couple of weeks, I will be sharing goals with you and will WELCOME comments and encouragement!  I am attending a Goal Workshop tomorrow night, and I hope that it will spur me on to really thinking about what I fully want.  Not what my parents think I should have, not what my friends are doing, not what my peers judge me into doing.  What Ruth Wants To Do.

Over the last few months, I really have been rolling that around in my head – what is it that I really want to DO with my life.  In my early 20’s, it was to get married and show people that I didn’t have to have a degree to get anywhere.  I was SO adamant about that point.  SO!  And I still think it is crazy for something jobs to discount experience for time spent in college.  After all, I technically spent 4 years and PLENTY of credit hours.  But in this world, I can’t force people to think the way I do.  So, I am caving and getting a degree….10 years after the first time I started.  10.  Full.  Years.

GOAL 1 in 2013 (to be completed by December, 2013)

Graduate college at UAB with a Marketing Degree.

That means I have to take eight classes in 2013.

That means this spring, I am taking three classes.

That means this summer, I need to take two or three classes (depending on what is available)

And that means hopefully just two in the Fall of 2013.

And while that sounds like a lot to most people, to me, I just have to stay focused.  I’m Broke As A Joke, so travelling doesn’t hasn’t been an option.  And I have spent the last 10 years being (relatively) footloose and fancy-free.  I’ve had worse.  So what is one really tough, busy, mentally hard year.  I will tell you what – it seems like NOTHING compared to the emotionally hard years of 2008-2010.  Mental strength, I can find.

 

This goal is a perfect example of falling down 7 times.  I really haven’t EVER been public about this – if you point-blank ask me, I would tell you.  But I certainly don’t even like to tell people this piece of information.  It automatically prompts two responses: I thought you had one or Why didn’t  you finish?  The first statement making me feel inadequate about lack of education albeit PLENTY of hardcore experience.  The second question is just never fun to answer…but it usually goes like this:  I was supposed to graduate a semester early as I came into college with 14 credit hours (a full semester) based on my High School education.  I wanted to take off a semester and work or do SOMETHING other than school because I was freaking out about being 21 and having to get a full time job.  At the time, I was fully advised (told straight-up) just to finish school and get it over with.  And in one of my better bits of rebellion, just decided to fail school instead.  Go ahead.  Just read that again.  To be honest, I don’t really know if it was a conscious decision or one I just let happen, but  I received a 68 in a class that I had to have a 70 to graduate.  The best part?  If I had just attended class, if I had JUST SHOWED UP to class, I would have graduated.  My sorry a$$ decided that I didn’t want to.  So I tried talking to three teachers and no one would help me (I don’t know that I would have either).  It is one of a HANDFUL of regrets that I have.  Not one that I focus and morn every day, but one single event that if I could go back and change I would.  But let’s be honest….would I go back to being 21?  Uhhh, NO.  I can’t think of a worser time to go back to!  I happen to like 30, and graduating college NOW is going to mean something that graduating then NEVER would have.

So.  Here on my 8th time getting up, let’s graduate college, shall we?

reading

sometimes i read.  Like. Ah-Lot.  And then there are other times when I read nothing at all and the thought of a word coming across my eyes is tiresome.  Like all things for Ruth, its all or nothing (is there a pill for that?!)

What I am reading NOW:

Why Be Useful?  Athleticism & Sex Appeal  – Best line? ” I’d venture to guess that most women could care less about how much you bench or squat. They’re not interested in your ego-repleting power lifts.  However, a display of athleticism like walking around on your hands or a back-flip really seems to get the hormones flowing.  Or so I’ve been told.  Just food for thought for those looking to impress the fairer sex.” –  True Alex.  So dang TRUE.

The Oil Cleansing Method – I started last week with Caster Oil and Grapeseed oil (purchased off of Amazon, of COURSE).  And so far, I LOVE it.  It gets all my mascara off and I swear I am prettier already!

No ‘Poo! – yeah, Yall know I hardly like to shower or wash my hair.  And now I am contemplating moving to baking soda.  I care DEEPLY about what I eat….and your skin covers your ENTIRE BODY!  Why shouldn’t I care what goes on it!  I haven’t made the jump yet.  Trying to keep it to ONE major change a month.  (right?!)

5 “FUN” things that are NOT that fun – I really DON’T mind going someplace where I don’t know people, but the other four – Spot. On.

Hater’s guide to William Sonoma – Notes from Drew: Where else am I supposed to put my dirty cheese?

and on the other end of the spectrum…

At Last – get out a tissue, please.

The difference between asking how I can pray for you and praying for you – Funny thing is I ran across this article on Monday – no more than 30 minutes after I had texted my roommate how I could pray for her this week.  This kinda has been sitting on my heart all week.  Much like the SAME roommate who asked me about my {bad} attitude this week, and could it possibly be related to time spent in the Word. (I did tell her to ignore my snide and off-handed response.  She said it didn’t bother her.)

The Christmas Party that Almost Wasn’t – and then best words, “Let’s make ourselves available and then watch how this whole wonderful thing unfolds, OK?”  Ok.

 

Just thoughts from an extremely all OVER the place chick.

perhaps

Wordle: Untitled

in·tense

1.  existing or occurring in a high or extreme degree: intense heat.
2.  acute, strong, or vehement, as sensations, feelings, or emotions: intense anger.
3.  of an extreme kind; very great, as in strength, keenness,severity, or the like: an intense gale.
4.  having a characteristic quality in a high degree: The intense sunlight was blinding.
5.  strenuous or earnest, as activity, exertion, diligence, or thought: an intense life.

ag·gres·sive

1.  characterized by or tending toward unprovoked offensives,attacks, invasions, or the like; militantly forward or menacing: aggressive acts against a neighboring country.
2.  making an all-out effort to win or succeed; competitive: an aggressive basketball player.
3.  vigorously energetic, especially in the use of initiative and forcefulness: an aggressive salesperson.
4.  boldly assertive and forward; pushy: an aggressive driver.
5.  emphasizing maximum growth and capital gains over quality,security, and income: an aggressive mutual fund.

So you see all those words up there.  Right?  And you ABSOLUTELY see the negative connotation in those words.  RIGHT?

Over the last couple of months, these are the words that have been used to describe me.

“Ruthie, you are seriously intense.  Like scary intense.”

“Well you are the most aggressive instructor we have in the mornings.”

All statements by men in my life – not men who I just met but people who know me for the most part.  It’s like when people say things like, “I cant believe you are still skinny!” or “When you gain all that weight back…”  Ummmm, thanks?!

I swear, at first I did NOT know if I should be offended?  Angry? Hurt?  Pissed off and starting a fight?  But then.  *LIGHTBULB*  These are things that make up ME.  And hot DAMN. I am awesome. (yeah, it only took me 30 years to get to that point)

I am SO scary intense most of the times.  I get obsessive over a piece of clothing, a drink, a shampoo.  But do you understand that to me is passion.  Passion over things that are important to me.  My family, my friends, my coworkers – All I EVER want for you is to be healthier, better, live longer (than me.  Please let me go first!), and have the HAPPIEST life ever.  I am extremely passionate over fitness and health. A love affair that started 15 years ago and started to streamline into something REALLY awesome 7 years ago.  I am passionate about people being HEALTHY.  I have never cared what you put in YOUR mouth as long as you are self-aware.  I feel like people should be educated about artificial sweeteners and carbonated drinks and the fact that if you can’t pronounce something on a label, your body probably doesn’t really want it anyways.  I want you to walk and run and be outside and to NOT have allergies or knee pain or stomach issues or headaches.  I want you to be happy being YOU – the VERY best version of you.  And so I really DO suppose that makes me agreesive.  And intense.  But it also makes me passionate, and loving, and YOUR BEST cheerleader.  The VERY best cheerleader you can have.

I guess in the South that makes me a very strong, Yankee personality – a TOTALLY unfavorable nickname given to me by my ex (always said fairly snarky and usually when we disagreed about something).  In my years of aging, I have mellowed CONSIDERATELY.  I don’t think you are out to get me, or that if we disagree on issues that we can’t hangout.  But I also am NOT afraid of rolling my eyes at you, and telling you that an idea is stupid.  Like going to BodyPump 6 days a week, or running 20 miles without having trained a minute for it, or even that you CAN’T reduce the fat in one specific area – I don’t care HOW many situps you do.  All you are going to do is build muscle UNDER your fat.  So why don’t you think about changing your diet.  Why don’t you think about getting some additional sleep.  Why DON’T you think saying no to the 5th dinner out this week with friends you haven’t seen!

So I guess all this is to say, I love you.  I really do.  I’m may be TOTALLY wonky.  But you, blog-reader.  YOU!  I love.  And it’s how I get through the day.

{friday fun} thoughts

I cannot stop listening to this chick.  Video is pretty awesome too!

Delta Rae – Bottom of the River

 

Things I have been obsessing over this week (WHY do I get so obsessed with people and things?!  I scare myself. And others. But the good news is, the ones who love me, love me BIG and don’t care about that.)

  1. Socks.  I WANT BOOT SOCKS.  But I don’t get where people are purchasing them.  So.  Here, Here, Here, Here, Here, Here.  Or I could do what my friend L-dawg does and steal her husband’s socks (I think he would share).  But THEN here is my next thought…I think I am TOO old to be buying cheap socks.  I mean, today I have on Smart Wool….Two different socks  that is, but another story my friends.  But spending $25 on one pair of socks.  Sometimes I have a hard time choking that down.  So I think I am getting these – BOGO, hello!
  2. 4 Runners.  I have no idea why.  I’ve just decided like two weeks ago I want to sell my car and buy something SUPER cheap – and a ’99-’03 4Runner seems to be in that budget!  So.  Buy my car, or find me a 4Runner.  But I’ve been getting obsessive over it.
  3. Speaking of car loans, I got a notice from the bank that I can skip a payment this year!  YESS! (Except for I’m not stupid people.  I feel sorry for people who DON’T like the fine print.  I really do.  I read the back side of credit card statements!)  So.  Let’s get this straight.  AmFirst wants me to skip a payment, add it to the loan, accrue the interest and AND (best part) PAY THEM FOR IT!  You have to pay $35 to skip the payment!  Poor people.  Paying money to add money into the loan.  It’s been making me mad.
  4. Croatia.  Yes this IS how my brain works.  I want to go right now.  Like WOAH right now.  It is SO beautiful and I just can’t quite figure out how to make it happen.
  5. Actually, I have been fanticizing about vacationing a LOT.  My previous boss was kind of an ass-hat, so I haven’t had vacation, per se since last year.  And the week I took off between jobs to pack my house up does NOT count.  Trust me.  Chattanooga, Nashville, Fitzpatrick, Florida, Colorado, Mt. Hood….yes.  ALL of those places I want to go.
  6. Kombucha.  I have tried this damn drink (woah what’s with the strong words?!) like a million times.  I threw away the first two times, but this week, I found one I love!  It’s SO good for you. It promotes good gut health, etc.  Actually I am HORRIBLE at explaining it, but Rob Wolf ISN’T horrible at explaining anything!  So now I am trying to decide where I can buy it for cheaply because at $3.50 a pop,its rather pricey.
  7. I GOT NEW GLASSES.  And I am in love.  Like OBSESSIVE LOVE with my glasses.  But as anything in my life, I just don’t know how to love small 😉

 

its about to get REALZ

MEN.

Boys.

Whatever you want to call the male species.  I AM FED UP WITH YOU.  All of you!

I think that I can blame most of it on the Southern Upbringing with mommas who did everything, the lack of developed leadership, and maybe less churching than they needed, or probably a mix of ALL THREE.

EXAMPLE NUMERO UNO.

1.  been talking to this guy – no biggie – but actually TALKING (not texting!) and have been enjoying his company.  Last couple of days at work have been busy, it’s Les Mills Launch week at Gold’s Gym, AND we have some family junk going on (doesn’t everyone!).  I didn’t respond to a text last night because I got in bed at 8:22p last night (so. dang. tired.)  The Text I Got This Morning:

5:44a – man: tiny bit confused but HEY I can be used to whatever.  Would appreciate the truth from you.

6:43a – ME: wait, what? what are you confused about? {internets, are you listening??  this is good.}

6:44a – man: I thought you were going to make me happy. If you want something else, then I would appreciate it.  But now I am crushed.  I am taking your number out of my phone.

Wait.  WHAT??  Like, you KNOW this dude was just sitting around for like 12 hours, building up situations in his head.  Meanwhile I was learning Choreography, Cooking and trying to make sure my dogs were played with.  OH.  HE’s 43 YEARS OLD.

image

“I thought you were going to make me happy.”  Read: I thought that YOU were GOING TO MAKE ME happy.  Not, what’s up, what are you doing? How has your day been?  Is everything ok?  Can I come take the garbage out for you?   Yeah, any of those things would be AWESOME.  But that is not what this man said.  HA.

2.  Instance # 2.

Sex.  Yeah, I know i know i KNOW.  But since I am a member of eHarmony and I have been a PAST (and NEVER AGAIN) subscriber to match.com,  but even in a “safe” environment, I have been propositioned more TIMES ONLINE than I can count.  And no one wants to talk on the phone any more.  OR (heaven forbid!) actually meet in person!

3.  Instance # 3

Professional environment.  Apparently these don’t exist any more.  Or men don’t get how to compliment a woman, appreciate her, then just let it GO.  there is NO faithfulness, no honest intentions, and for CERTAIN they do not know how to treat a lady.  I would rather just wear baggy clothing almost.  ALMOST.

SO on to my rant (wait, that wasn’t it??) – HOW DO YOU FIND A GOOD MAN now a days?  Am I going to have to MOVE out of Birmingham?  I want to get married again, but even before that, I want to have a HEALTHY relationship!

Have you listened to David Platt’s Secret Church from November?  No?  Well I listened to it again.  It talks about the “gift” of singleness.  While most of us view it as a pair of used socks that someone gives us for our birthday, it is NOT that.  This is truly a gift that God gives us.  What is funny is that once we hit a certain age, especially 30’s, single people (including me) think, well HECK am I going to be single for the rest of my life?!  But the point isn’t that short term view of what God has given us.  I can’t sit here and try to decide if God WANTS or INTENDS for me to be single for the rest of my life.  But the fact is that I am single.  And in that, God has given me something AWESOME – where I don’t have to focus on children or a husband.  But where I can be more open to HIM and what He will do in my life.

This is what I want.  Fast-forward to minute 40:01.  DO IT RIGHT NOW.

RADICAL.